


Sleepless

by BlixaLooksCarsick



Category: Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: Café, F/M, Fluff, Mundane, Sleep, Sleepless, gratuitous fluff, post Crimson Masquerade, slight Crimson Masquerade spoilers I guess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-07
Updated: 2020-07-07
Packaged: 2021-03-04 17:47:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,501
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25130347
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlixaLooksCarsick/pseuds/BlixaLooksCarsick
Summary: Even the pursuit of great opportunities in one's career can be an ordeal, as one Ren Amamiya quickly discovered.
Relationships: Amamiya Ren/Niijima Makoto, Kurusu Akira/Niijima Makoto
Comments: 2
Kudos: 29





	Sleepless

**Author's Note:**

> I'm gonna stick with the Ren Amamiya name from now on. I used Akira Kurusu on Crimson Masquerade because that's the only name I was aware of at the time. While I like both, consistency is key. And honestly, it'd be a pain to go and swap the name on CM. Sometimes it be like that.

With the exception of the strange events last year, Makoto Niijima had never seen her fiancé so tired. Ren Amamiya’s spirit was now unburdened by the machinations of an ancient lord of Chaos, but the wear and tear of his budding career as culinary genius was a comparable storm to endure. Sometimes it was the long hours in the classroom alongside his part-time job at LeBlanc; sometimes it was a sudden event in need of his talents as ‘cook extraordinaire’. Today, it is the triad of responsibilities squashing him all at once.

By now, she was well acquainted with his appearance following an all-nighter. Unless one knew exactly where to look, none could ever guess. But Makoto and Ren had been studying each other for years now; the oft-unseen subtleties were home to her, through sight and touch. And all the same, she was unpleasantly shocked when they met for lunch outside Tokyo University that afternoon. He looked more dead than alive, and her very expression betrayed her thoughts upon seeing him.

The look in his eyes and his mischievous smile were an ill partner to his pallor and the darkness under his eyelids.

_However did he manage to sound so normal earlier on the phone?_

_How on Earth did he make it all the way here in one piece?_

_How is he even standing now?_

She would be deathly worried if she did not already know. But even then, her concerns were not without reason. School and work was one thing; school and work while planning, coordinating and preparing the banquet for the birthday of the Prime Minister’s son was a challenge far beyond. Ren tackled it fearlessly, with the distinctive confidence of a certain Joker, leader of the Phantom Thieves of Hearts. The undertaking seemed so simple and harmless at first.

“Not a wink, huh?” Makoto greeted him with a quick peck on the lips.

“Nope. Third night’s the charm, though. All goes well, I’ll manage to squeeze in a few hours of sleep tonight.” Despite the visible exhaustion, he was sufficiently composed to hold out his arm for her to take. “And if not, well, you know what they say about the number four.”

“Don’t even joke about that.” She held on to her arm tightly, to enjoy the warmth of his presence, and – if needed be – to be his support should his step falter. “Hey, there’s a little outdoors café nearby. I’m sure it’s no LeBlanc, but I’ve been meaning to give it a try.”

That was a lie. She managed to spot the place in the nick of time as they walked. They had many other alternatives to go for lunch, all of which were a little too far for his current state. No matter his resilience, Makoto would take no chances. They sat at the nearest table, with a wide umbrella keeping the couple under the shade. The young woman ordered the recommendation of the day, barely caring to read what it was. Her fiancé ordered Americano, which meant he wished to take his time. She doubted another shot of caffeine would be much help by now. 

“I’m serious, Ren. You look like you need some sleep, badly.” Makoto said while they waited for their beverages.

“I know.” Ren rubbed his eyelids a couple more seconds than necessary. “I tried getting some sleep last night, but just couldn’t. Nerves kept me up, and I couldn’t risk a nap after class. For all I know, I’ll sleep right through the rest of the week.”

“Would that be so bad?” She gave his hand a gentle squeeze, feeling no shame over being the devil on Ren’s shoulder for once.

“I literally can’t come up with an answer to that.” He chuckled. Though he was smiling, his eyes cursed the irony to his predicament. Ever the creative and diligent student, he obtained the opportunity of a lifetime as peers and professors continued to speak highly of his culinary skills. Somehow, those mutterings fell on the right ear at the right time. Then a letter sealed his fate for the week. But this enviable position quickly began to feel like anything but. 

“You know, if you can’t sleep tonight, I’ll come up to your room and lull to sleep myself.” Makoto had slowly been coming to terms that her partner and her friends found her singing pleasant. 

“I can’t guarantee I’ll be able to fall asleep.” 

“Are you saying stress is more powerful than me?”

“Not at all. It’s just that, sleep is the last thing on my mind when you’re in my room at night.” Even years after they began dating, he still found ways to make her flustered. “I really would like that, though. You lulling me to sleep, I mean.”

They briefly interrupted their conversation as the waiter brought their drinks. His coffee was exactly as expected, while hers looked strangely elaborate. On first impression, she was not even sure it was alright for her to drink it, so she let it sit and cool for a moment. Ren did the same, though it was his custom to take in the aroma and a sip at its hottest; he then would praise the coffee, even if it were of poor quality. But today, silence held back that moment. Through the veil of rising steam between them, his image was almost surreal in her eyes – like he was blurring. 

Only then did she realise that it was a particular hot day. 

The events that followed seemed to play out as if in slow motion. Makoto’s well-honed reflexes and instincts died hard. She was already on her feet before the scene played out, before Ren’s head fell on the table and the hot coffee splashed cruelly on his face. She quickly stepped to the other side of the circular table and caught her fiancé in her arms. He was already asleep, and the rude awakening averted altogether. 

Rather than returning to her seat, Makoto sat on the chair next to him. She rolled up her sweater into a soft bundle and carefully placed it under Ren’s head. He did not seem like he would wake up anytime soon. 

This was a strange turn of events, but she could hardly complain. Ren was getting some much needed sleep, even if conditions were not ideal. All things considered, this was not much of a compromise. She had all she needed for an afternoon with her other half - the loveliest company, tranquillity, and what turned out to be a very decent cup of coffee. The wide cover of the umbrella would shield them comfortably from the glare of the sun. 

A few minutes later, Makoto poured herself into a book. She was in no mood to study, so she picked a recently purchased novel. The bookmark was a LeBlanc card she picked up back in the day, when she joined the Phantom Thieves. Before, it would have surprised her that this memento had lasted so long, but a few little things from those days somehow outlasted their supposed lifespan, even as life went on. 

Sip by sip, and page by page, the minutes coalesced into an hour. Her cup was empty and she felt slightly tempted to try Ren’s coffee, though she reasoned it was unpleasantly cold by now. And with the hour passed, he still gave no signs of waking up. She leaned closer to him just for peace of mind, and found the reassuring, almost imperceptible sound of his breathing. He stirred not an inch, as if his exhaustion had taken him beyond the reach of dreaming. 

With one more hour likely ahead, Makoto ordered another coffee and returned to her book. But as the afternoon went on, she found that she could no longer quite focus on her reading. No matter how engaging or shocking the narrative, something on the corner of her eye kept tugging insistently at her vision. And before she was even aware of what was happening, she could no longer pay any attention at her book. Marking the progress with the café card, she put the novel down.

Nothing had changed. No uncanny, unforeseen event snatched her awareness. No mundane, or extraordinary urgency called for her involvement. And yet, it was special to her, in a way that made her wish the world would stop turning for just a moment. 

Makoto and Ren were busy people. Even the days they were lucky to start together were bound to start too early. The lingering joys of the nights before never lasted long upon waking. Even if the other’s presence lingered warm on the pillow or the skin, it was not enough. They were always left wanting. And so, they went about their day, longing for their next encounter, to make up for the ache of parting. 

She had come to terms with it. For all their fantastic deeds, they could not steal time from the world, not even a little for themselves. Few were the times they could indulge in ‘five more minutes’ – that was the way of the world, after all. Things on that front would hardly change after they married. Love may conquer all, but it would never dull the little heartbreak of leaving his side every morning. And it would never soften the blow of him waking up and finding her gone. 

Everyone who ever loved another eventually grew accustomed to it. They learned to cope and to treasure whatever moments came their way. Makoto would not wait until time taught her through experience. She had the now, and that was all she cared about.

The young woman eased back on her seat and took one more sip of her coffee. After that, her cup would go cold and forgotten. She barely heard the soft groan out of Ren’s lips as she brushed a long strand of hair from his face. Whatever happened in her life on the years to come, this one present image would stay with her forever. She had seen it before, when waking in the middle of the night with Ren at her side; always under the thick cloak of darkness, his head resembled a flock of ravens. In the most surreal of imaginings, she pictured them flying off at the slightest touch. The impression was much different under broad daylight. That unruly head of his was a most inviting sight. 

Makoto mingled her fingers with the locks of his hair, playing delicate but freely, like a child in a garden of ebon. And then she wondered whether she could one day tame that wild hair of his, or if their children would end up getting that from him. She continued to toy the minutes away, twirling and waving, never once disturbing Ren’s slumber. And every motion, no matter how small, tempted her into joining him, just laying her head next to him and see the day turn into night. The notion might have sounded trite from all the books and films she has known. She could not deny the appeal, regardless.

_If I’m gonna indulge in the cliché. Let me go all the way…_

Without thinking it too long, Makoto began singing into his ear. She kept it barely above a whisper, but not out of embarrassment. The song was for no ears but his. She wondered if her song reached him, wherever his thoughts were. If perhaps he was dreaming, if maybe she was there with him, in some scenario or story, where they went forever untouched by the trials and tribulations of the world. At the very least, she hoped his dreaming was peaceful.

And the afternoon passed them by, turning dusk into a dark hue of orange. The last remnants of the day were ripples on the black surface of the coffee. Makoto’s eyelids began feeling heavy. Were she to fall asleep now, she could be grateful for this one moment. But whether by chance or miracle, she got to see Ren open his eyes. They lay but two inches away, sprawled out over the table, without a care in the world.

Ren was awake now, but he said nothing at all for a few seconds.

“I thought I’d heard something nice. Maybe I dreamed it?”

“Who knows? Maybe you did.” Her voice carried a hint of juvenile mischief. 

“So much for having lunch together.” He passed his hand across his hair as he sat upright. No indication of awareness about Makoto’s earlier affections. “I’m sorry about that.”

“You don’t need to apologise for anything.” She smiled. “I’d say this little get together was very much worth it. You got to actually get some sleep for a change.”

“That, and you napping right next to me. A win-win.”

“I was this close.” Makoto signalled with her index and her thumb. “Would have been nice, unadvisable and risky in a public place, but… very nice, nonetheless. It’s okay, ‘every moment with you is a special one’.” She grinned.

“That’s my line, and just like that you made it sound actually good. I’ll go lick my wounds for a moment, and pay at the counter. Be right back.”

Makoto gathered their belongings while Ren was at the counter. Everything was good and ready to go, but something gave her pause. Her sweater, suddenly a makeshift pillow, was still warm from his touch. Even now that they were back in the flow of the world, she had the lingering echo of a special moment in her hands. She wished that somehow she could frame or preserve that moment before the passing of the days rendered it a fond memory.

A simple and fortuitous couple of hours – a thing of beauty. 

“Ready to go?” Ren was back, looking more awake and whole now. 

“Yeah.” Makoto linked her arm around his as they walked to the corner to catch a taxi. 

They spent most of the following while in silence, which gave her room to think. Among the many things, practical and mundane, one in particular kept pushing its way to the forefront. She barely felt any discomfort on entertaining the image earlier, but now she felt so surprised for having thought it at all. Still, she did not fight it, as the image of small unruly curls filled her head.

_Kids, huh? Maybe someday…_

She did her best to hide her smile. Putting the notion away, she turned to look at her fiancé, whose eyes were lost in the night cityscape. Seeing him so rested now was an indirect reminder than come morning, he would be extremely busy. She might not even get to see him until much later in the day. If so, they would have to make the most of the night.

As for Ren, the last thing on his mind was the monstrous tide of work looming over his head. Rather, he kept wondering about that song in his dream. Actually, he could remember nothing of it, images or moments, - nothing, except for that song.


End file.
